The 3 Soul Qualities you want to embody in your inner & outer home

I´ll be straightforward with you: I will not tell you which 3 Soul Qualities are yours to embody, because this is only for one person to decide: that´s you. You and your soul know exactly why you came here, and which combination of Qualities make you unique, and define your signature energy. But I will help you get a grasp on them, and even choose them by the end of this article. To begin with, here is a collection of Soul Qualities that humans usually love:

SAFETY   FULLNESS   CONNECTEDNESS   SENSUALITY

FEELING-OF-BEING-HELD   JOY   FUN    EASE   WILDNESS

VIBRANCY  RICHNESS   FLUIDITY  FEELING-OF-BELONGING

CALM   PEACE   LOVE   PROSPERITY   INTER-CONNECTEDNESS

LIGHTNESS   GROUNDEDNESS   ROCK´N ROLL    AUTONOMY

SOUVEREIGNTY

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I learned to work with qualities from an amazing teacher, Peter Grunwald, who calls them soul qualities.

In the trainings, we used to stand together in a circle as a group and collect soul qualities before and after everything we did. For example, after a teaching session, we voiced the qualities that we took from the session. Or before we started a project, we collected the qualities that each of us wanted to see and experience with this project. Needless to say, this made a huge difference.

When you start to consciously connect with certain qualities you like and envision them, you start to feel them. You are already creating your reality the way you want it to be. This is powerful stuff, and it’s also called Neuroplasticity (the ability of the brain to change and re-structure itself).

The mastery lies not only in choosing the qualities for your home or your daily endeavors, but in consciously choosing the soul qualities that you want to embody every day, throughout your lifetime here on this planet.

Once you have chosen the qualities you are here to embody, you start to feed them into your system, and I love to do this with rituals. It can be as simple as speaking out the intention for your qualities during your morning ritual, meditation, or prayer, and/or blessing yourself with your soul qualities while massaging rich oil onto your body after taking a shower in the evening.

So, what lies behind this practice?

HOW DO YOU WANT TO FEEL?

 

Well, it’s never about the things we do in life; it’s always about how we feel with the things we do. How do you want to feel in life — with the things you do?

You want a new home. How do you want to feel in your new house? What qualities do you want to live within it? What qualities do you want the house itself to have?

For example, every room in our home has certain qualities that we set up when we first moved in. The kitchen embodies the qualities of LIGHT, CLARITY, and NOURISHMENT; our living room represents COSINESS, DARKNESS (like in a dark cave), NURTURING, and PLAYFULNESS. The bedroom embodies the qualities of REGENERATION and LOVE-NEST.

You can ask yourself the same questions about everything that is important to you: Your relationships (with yourself and your body included), your food, your clothes, your work projects, your holidays, your car…

How do you want to feel with… ? 


How should… feel? 


Which qualities should… have?

 

BE THE CREATRIX & THE CREATOR OF YOUR OWN LIFE

 

It is such a rewarding practice, as it allows you to experience your own power to create the life you want. You experience yourself as the creatrix, the creator of your own precious life.
While you feed and nourish yourself with your consciously chosen qualities — those that light your fire, give you goosebumps, and make you truly happy — new neural networks are being formed in your brain.
When you’ve never experienced home as a place of REGENERATION and RELAXATION, because home was linked to exhaustion and work overload, you re-code your neural network by linking home to the qualities you truly want to feel at home.
And you do this with every area of your life. As my teacher puts it: “I want it all!” Yes, me too! How about you? You are a sovereign human being, capable of dreaming, visualizing, thinking, and creating. Use it for your own happiness. It is powerful work.
So, pause for a moment, lean back in your chair, feel your sit bones, your feet on the floor, breathe, and ask yourself: Which of the qualities we’ve already talked about do you love the most? Which ones give you that real, good gut feeling?

HOW TO FIND YOUR SOUL QUALITIES

 

1.Working with oppositions


If you have difficulties to decide on 3 qualities, it helps to look at where your biggest disappointments, your biggest pain in life in general or concerning a certain area lies. For example, this could be your constant feeling of being an outsider, of not belonging. This is also a “quality”, but one that causes pain instead of good feelings. Find more of those “qualities” (maybe its loneliness, rigidity, scarcity,…)


Now, if you have extracted the qualities that are responsible for the main sorrow & pain in your life, you can do some opposition-work: find out the opposite qualities of those. (there are some helpful websites that support you in finding opposite terms) Stay with the process until you've found words that really evoke very good, delicious feelings in you. In our example of feeling like an outsider, these could be “BELONGING”, “CONNECTEDNESS” or “COMMUNITY”.

Pay attention to how your body reacts when you read certain words/qualities — this is the best indication! You should feel something when reading a quality that belongs to you: a warm or hot feeling in the belly, goosebumps, you feel warm and bright as if the sun shines on you, you feel excitement,…or a relaxing peace…

It is also possible that you feel triggered and experience an unusually intense or uncomfortable reaction to a word, or that you feel a certain ignorance towards the word — which could indicate, that this quality wants to be integrated.

I have a somewhat funny example to illustrate this for you: When I was working with my teacher on soul-qualities in connection with my visual pathway for the very first time, he worked with me on the quality “safety”. I was in my thirties and had spent almost my entire life in schools, universities, training courses,…yet the only thing I could think of was the phrase “road safety”. That felt strange, weird and amusing all at the same time. And I knew for sure that something was wrong with my neural pathway related to the quality of “safety” if “road safety” was the only thing I could associate with it.

2. Analyzing a present situation
Another way to approach this is to look at a certain area of your life — let’s say intimate relationships —  and ask yourself this: What is the essence of how you experience Love & Intimacy at the moment? Or: what is the essence of how you´ve always experienced Love & Intimacy? Here, it is important that you don’t settle until you truly feel it deep within your womb, your gut, or your bones. It’s easy to give ourselves “perfect” answers, but you can tell when the words are only skimming the surface and not truly connecting to your core.
So, a real answer could be: “I experience Love & Intimacy in a way that doesn’t nourish me.” (That was my answer many years ago. )
This is already very deep stuff. It may bring up trauma buried inside of you, and at that point, you’ll need help with the process. Find whatever help you can get — be it a type of therapy, a specific healing method, or mind-body techniques that you practice.
But when you finally have your extracted essence, here´s what you do:
Turn it into the opposite:
I intend to experience love and intimacy in a way that nourishes me. And right now, this is just a sentence. If you’re lucky, you might already feel it deep in your gut, allowing you to own these words.
But it’s possible that you can’t feel this at all. Instead, you might feel resistance to the new sentence, or you might only feel the pain of not having experienced nourishing relationships. That’s when you know where the shadow work needs to be done. What feelings are triggered in me when I speak this sentence out loud? Often, shame and feelings of inferiority come up: “this doesn´t feel right, because I don’t feel worthy of experiencing intimate relationships as nourishing”. Ok, then another round of healing work is needed. For me, this includes, among other things, inner child work. What might it be for you?


But when you’re finally able to feel the words and truly own them, you’ve found a quality for how you want to experience intimate relationships: NOURISHING.

That was, of course, just an example. You can experience love and intimacy differently — e.g., ENRICHING, SAFE, VIBRANT, PASSIONATE, PEACEFUL, etc.

AN IMPORTANT NOTE ON THIS: Don’t stop aligning yourself with the chosen quality, even if you don’t yet feel it or experience resistance to it. You need to stick to the intention — that’s how new pathways are created in your brain.
“Walking” on new paths inside your brain almost always feels awkward, even wrong, at the beginning. Deeply feeling the quality you want to embody is almost always the byproduct of walking the path, sticking to it, aligning with it, and having a conscious intention for the quality. The feeling itself is not here to guide you. What guides you is the intention for the feeling.
You can’t control how feelings come and go, but you can control the intentions you consciously choose every day.

HOW TO CONSCIOUSLY INTEGRATE YOUR CHOSEN QUALITIES INTO YOUR EVERYDAY LIFE

 

Pause again, allow your spine to align, allow your back to widen, allow the air to come in through your nose, and breath out.

Which three soul qualities do you have so far? (It’s okay if there’s only one, or if there are five!)
Now it’s all about being creative and consciously integrating your soul qualities into your daily life.

Here’s one of my favorite examples for integrating my soul qualities into my daily routine:
 - I consciously set the intention for … when making my cup of coffee after my morning routine.
 - I work with them when painting and being creative (I also use this a lot to work with the shadow sides and the opposite qualities).
 - After taking a shower in the evening, I embed my soul qualities in a blessing for myself and speak it out loud as I massage rich body oil onto my body.
 - I have certain qualities for when I’m driving my car: I speak them out loud when I start the engine.

As you can see, over time, you get creative and playful with qualities — there are, of course, more than three soul qualities to embody. (But three is a good number to start with.)
Some will, of course, change over the years — I’ve experienced this multiple times. After I had worked very dedicatedly with the quality of BELONGING — since I hadn’t felt any of it within me for my entire life — finally, a day came when I realized I felt so much belonging within myself that I could turn to other qualities I wanted to integrate as well.
And of course, there are qualities that you want to embody in relation to certain activities. Like when I’m driving the car, I want to experience SAFETY, PROTECTION, BEING GUIDED, and PRESENCE.
As my teacher said:

As my teacher said:

"VISION LEADS, BRAIN, EYE, BODY AND THE SURROUNDING FOLLOW" *

 

That’s the way it’s done: The qualities you envision embodying are the ones that lead you. The rest — yes, including the material world — will follow. There is no other way.
Our problem as humans is that we experience certain qualities in our upbringing (and in past lives) that get programmed into our neural network. How you experience intimate relationships, home, money, or work becomes linked to certain qualities that don’t make us happy at all.

As we grow up, those qualities (e.g., not feeling safe, suppression, scarcity, overwhelm, etc.) become our “leaders.” They are the unconsciously chosen qualities we follow in relation to intimate relationships, home, money, and work. And there’s not much guessing about how the outcome is going to feel: somehow unsafe, somehow suppressed, always too little money, always stressed out, and where is the love…
Because we always follow a vision. That’s how we function as humans. You may not be aware of your encoded vision, your internal guideline, or your intentions. But that’s how it works — really very much like the hardware of your computer.

 

BEHIND EVERY LIVED EXPERIENCE IN THE MATERIAL WORLD LIES A PROGRAMMING IN YOUR NEURAL PATHWAYS

 

So, there is always some kind of vision programmed into you, which often really has nothing to do with what we understand as “vision,” as it doesn’t feel big, bright, or good. Often, you don’t even know that you have such a “vision,” BUT it still leads you on, just as visions do.
You can always find your “real” vision (the one programmed into your neural pathways) by looking at your life: how it looks and how it feels.
Are you close to burnout, experiencing lack of money, love, or joy? That’s a good opportunity to look at your programming.
And then your reprogramming skills come into play: What good and exciting vision do you want to follow instead? And what are the Soul Qualities behind it?

BE BRAVE. BE RADICALLY DEDICATED TO YOUR OWN HAPPINESS. 
IF YOU AREN´T, WHO IS??

 

* This is a quotation from Peter Grunwald, Founder of The Eyebody Method®. I have worked with him for almost a decade. It enriched me deeply and laid the foundation for my work with Soul Qualities, which flows into every area of my life. I recommend his work, if you want to dive deeper into working with Soul Qualities in connection with your vision, brain & eyes.